Friday, December 16: Wrestling Before God

right now, i am consciously and determinedly veering my mind away from worrying.  Christ tells me, “do not let your heart be troubled.  trust in Me.” 

i am getting scared.  not because the Lord has decided to keep me waiting but because i feel i am losing the calm confidence that i used to have  in knowing that He would supply me more than what i ask for in the nick of time.  

is He not acting because He who sees all knows that i actually have more than enough time in my hands than i am believing?   come to think of it, my circumstances seem to agree with that.  however, the planner in me knows that His help is overdue. 

 “if I am complete in Christ, my prayer brings victory all the time. Prayer is effective only when there is completeness— “take up the whole armor of God . . . .”  — My Utmost For His Highest


“my Lord, i am not wrestling with Your ways.  why? because i trust in You.  i am where i am and i have what i have because of You.  i have gone a long way from nothing.  

although i speak my mind aloud, i ask You why, and i long to understand Your ways, but never doubt my deep love and faith in You, dear God.  i call on You and You supply all my needs. 

in Your heart, more important than meeting my temporal needs is growing me into Your loving best.  fill me, complete me, and sustain me dear Jesus. 

i look to that with hope and trust. 

thank You, Lord.”

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